“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. I can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”-Melody Beattie
While I had this whole profound idea to write about tonight…it all went out the door when I had this thought conjour up! So stick with me here but I promise while many and both ideas fed off of the quote above….this thought does still connect….
I work at a gym…we all know that, Most of us know that I used to work at the gym about four years abo too. This is the company where I got my first taste of management. Thought I liked it which is why I moved on into a different management position with a different company all together. Ironically I went from the Fitness idustry into the food industry….Haha….even as i type that i shake my head at the irony of it! Well while i am not in the industry again as a manager I am here, again. But i dont see this as going backwards at all. I get to be here as a front desk person, I dont have the stress or worries of a manager, i see things a little differently now.
Tonight I noticed this one woman, maybe mid 20s…who knows, i’m blind and she’s of Asisan decent so has good genes and they always look younger then what they actually are! Anyways….she had to be no bigger than a toothpick! Seriously! I barely saw her when she’d turn into her profile! I have skinny friends ok…just because i’m a big girl doesn’t mean i only have big girl friends! But this girl…woman, was SKINNY!! She had to be no bigger then a 00..or are there negative sizes for women’s clothing?? I wouldnt know, i’ve never seen anything less then an 8 in my life time, and i barely remember the size 8! LOL
Point being, while I may be voluptuous, fat, curvacious, heavy, obese, big boned, fluffy, etc….I NEVER want to be that thin! I dont even want to be thin! I want to be heathly and still keep my curves! Dont get me wrong, being big (however you want to vall it) has it’s health downfalls but I do my part to stay healthly. For one I work and workout at my gym on a regular basis, i keep active in general, I eat heathly (except once a month and we all know that week its all bets off…sorry but you fight mother nature and her gift!)….I am happy with myself….
Dont get me wrong, big women and skinny women alike have their image issues. I dont think that being lighter will solve all my image issues…hell i once was the size i want to be now and i know then i wasn’t happy with it! So as a woman, i may never entirely overcome those image issues. But i’m going to be heathly trying!
For me my workouts keep me mentally balanced. Its a stress and energy release for me….i have a bad day i can go to the gym and run it off and leave it there! Eating good and heathly food makes me feel good. I have better energy levels, better complexion, better dietary track…etc. So these ways have their positive sides while being a challenge at times in the long run its worth it for me.
My point…hey, bear with me, its 330am….but my point being that…image issues are an internal thing. I once had the body i now want and didnt want it then, I thought I still needed to be smaller! Its been a struggle my whole life. The difference then vs now? It was society impressioning me and making those decisions…not ME! So the important part in all this….stay fit, healthly and active…not because of peer pressure or society. But because you want to. Those women out there struggling to lose the weight…its a mental thing! I say it b/c I know it! I have tried for years to lose the extra baggage but it wasnt until this last year that i was able to drop and keep off 45 lbs! It was me who made the decision, not anyone else. Skinny or fat, you’ll never be happy with what you look like until you accept who you are…until you are grateful for the body God blessed you with.
I was blessed with curves, LOTS of them! Now I learn to manage those curves and keep them in proper propotion. I want to be more of a Queen Latifah body type, not a Kate Moss…but hey thats just me…you be who you want to be! And be happy, grateful, and content with it! Be grateful you have a life to live with, two legs that allow you to walk, arms to hug someone with, hands to touch and feel, eyes to see…be grateful for who you are! I am!